Eunuchs, Less Than 40 Winks & A Very Naughty Puppy

We’ve reached six months! Onwards and upwards (or rather outwards) to the third and final trimester!

So we’re getting some A* practise in with the whole no sleeping malarky at the moment. Baby likes to donk Suz on the bladder every few minutes just to check she’s still around and Bio-Oil combined with sticky summer nights are, so I’ve been told, as much fun as clapping with poo in your hands. I seem to have developed a heightened need to protect so most of my nights are spent balancing a chess board against our bedroom door as a booby-trap just in case I don’t hear an axe-murderer traipsing up the stairs. They appear to be alarmingly quiet in all the films and I’m determined not to be fooled.

I also got cracking with the nursery last week, which basically involved me hacking one of the built-in wardrobes out and stripping wallpaper… we’ve chosen quite a bright theme and lots of colourful wall stickers so it’s a case of getting the room back to basics before we can do any of the fun decorating stuff. Extra bonus, now we’ve spent so long thinking up nursery designs and seen all on offer, we’re starting to think adults are missing out when it comes to bedroom decor and have decided we’ll probably just turn our own bedroom into an intergalactic medieval safari-themed submarine. Complete with fireman’s pole down to the kitchen. Lawrence Llewellyn Bowen would probably agree with me as long as I agreed to some decadent curtain sashes and a cow-hide chaise longue.

This past weekend I travelled to compete in the European Team Champs in Germany where, while there, a popular past time amongst the GB athletes was to guess the sex of baby. The resounding prediction so far has been girl, although I’m willing to bet my bananas that’s just because they like teasing me about their future sons dating her. Which won’t be happening. Ever. Not unless they’d like their sons to become eunuchs. Speaking of which, my dogs very nearly found themselves living life without any trouser oranges when Suz and I returned home to find one of our kindly-sent parcels from JellyCat torn to shreds in the front garden (which some of you may remember I tweeted about once steam had finished spurting from my ears). Our youngest hound Gus has a tendency to make hamster bedding out of anything and it appears he’d had a whale of a time adding ‘ruining baby presents’ to his usual daily routine of barking at wasps, sniffing, weeing and bum-sliding across the grass. Luckily, he’d found the packaging itself bombastic enough not to care about the cuddly toys held in it and Mr Elephant and Mr Giraffe, aside from a dog-slobber shower, escaped unscathed. They looked a bit miffed following a hand wash but we’re pretty certain Mr Elephant’s perm will go back to normal any day now.

When it comes to all things baby we’re loving this week, check out some of the gadgets and gizmos we’re really excited to give a try once October arrives…

Firstly we’ve got the brilliant TotsBots and their bum-friendly reusable nappies. They come in cooler than cool designs and me and Suz have honestly felt nothing softer. Seriously, I’m considering just giving up pants from here on in. They’re like CLOUDS. We’re quite keen not to go down the disposable route if we can help it and these guys have got tonnes of great tips and advice if you fancy giving it a whirl yourself, so go check them out. Next up is Snugglbundl and their baby-lifting wrap. It’s essentially a fab bit of kit for helping mums lift their babies post birth and (hopefully) reduces the risk of them screaming blue murder should you need to get them from the car seat to the house smoothly. Anything that helps my eardrums gets a thumbs up from me and Suz is pretty keen not to blow too many stitches (should she need them) so we’re really, really happy to add this to our stash. Lastly, Totseat and their chair harnesses are welcomed with open arms in our home. They’re machine washable (I’ve heard a possible myth babies can be messy at mealtimes or something?), great for taking with you if eating out’s on the cards and, again, come in some awesome prints and designs. Suitable from 6 months up, the only way they could improve was if they went into the adult market for when Suz has had one too many vodka lemonades and can’t handle sitting upright…

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  1. Nice to see it’s not just my husband who’s in full blown ‘nest and protect’ mode! He’s also bought a wonderful book called Commando Dad by Neil Sinclair, which I will now be buying whenever a male friend’s wife or girlfriend falls pregnant, because it’s amazing! Best of luck to you and Suz, I’m enjoying reading your blog. (I’m also ginger, currently in possession of a bump and shop at Kiddicare Peterborough)

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