Due Dates, Man Boobs & SnuzPods

fat-bastard

Huh, so due date came and went. It was highly uneventful. I think Suz maybe had some twinges (which was possibly just wind) and we scared a woman while out on our dog walk who, once told baby was ready to appear, looked panicked in case it fell out there and then. We’ve tested quite a few of the old wives’ tales to try and get things moving along… although being someone who opts for PLAIN chicken at Nando’s (I know, it’s embarrassing, and I probably should have dumped her a long time ago), Suz isn’t massively up for getting involved with a spicy curry.

One good thing that has come from a little extra time (because nine months just really isn’t long enough) is the fact we’ve now got everything sorted. While Suz watched some sort of awareness programme on people involved in business who manage to function on zero braincells (The Apprentice or something) I got to work on a Moses basket stand, a nursing chair and Snuzpod. Together, we’ve also now made sure every item of clothing/bedding etc has been hand washed and hung up and the hospital bags are now ready and sat by our bedroom door. Which on reflection is actually a bit silly because Suz manages to fall arse over tit on them every time she goes for her 2am, 3am, 4.30am, 6:15am wees.

It’s still really alien trying to get my head around the fact a) a human’s got to come out of my girlfriend’s body, b) I’m about to become someone’s dad, c) one of the biggest moments in my life is about to happen. Suz and I talk about it all the time… how you’re constantly trying to prepare for something you have no idea how to prepare for. And the enormity of it all. I mentioned taking in one of our nice champagnes to the hospital to celebrate on the big day and Suz responded ‘we could, but didn’t we want to save it for something special?’ before quickly realising unless she gives birth to the reincarnation of Jesus, nothing much will top the birth of her own children. We’ve packed the champagne.

The other much less exciting news is that I’ve gone back to training. I’m resembling Fat Bastard post carb binge at the moment so it’s not a great deal of fun and I even turned down a topless magazine shoot this week on the basis I didn’t want to cause lots of spontaneous puking from readers. All exaggerations aside, I’ve had a few weeks off to enjoy myself, eat what I want and not panic about having that second (thirteenth) slice of red velvet cake and it’s definitely taken it’s toll. I feel like I’m at the heaviest I’ve ever been along with the most unfit, and now I’m excited to get back to my usual routine and see everything fall back into place. It was important I took some time out to rest though and I’m glad I did… this year went better than I could have expected and I wanted to make sure I crammed in some time together with Suz, dining out and relaxing with culinary treats at home, before our lives become that little more hectic and we’re grabbing meals in between bum changes and naps. It’ll be exciting to see how quick I can get back into shape and even better once Suz can join in. We spent a good few hours shopping for new gym kit the other day and after a few months of chilling out, we’re already feeling really inspired to get moving.

The Snuzpod might actually be the world’s best inventions by the way. Loads of mums and dads had recommended it to us and after reading up on the benefits, we can see why. It’s a lovely, safe way to have baby sleeping close at night and, as Suz intends to breastfeed, it’s a great way to get feeding done from the comfort of your own bed without worrying you might fall asleep before getting baby back to a cot. The transparent side comes down so your baby can see you in all your dribbly, open mouth sleeping glory, and you can settle them with a mere stretch of the arm if need be (or at least that’s what we like to tell ourselves. Cue fast forwarding to nights of pacing round the room doing lots of rocking). If you’ve used one yourself and got any feedback then send it on over, I’m always keen to hear what products worked for other parents.

Secondly… how comfy are nursing chairs? It’s a revelation! I may in fact attempt to grow a pair of breasts and insist in the taking over of feeding just so I get to rock in it more than I’ll currently be allowed. Ours is from Kub and comes with a handy footstool which again, yes, I’ll be trying to use at every possible moment. Suz can sit on a bean bag or something. She likes bean bags. We’ve chosen to have it in our room rather than the nursery, just so we can plonk ourselves in it in the middle of the night if baby’s a bit restless, and it fits in perfectly with the rest of the decor. Anything baby-related that doesn’t look too ‘baby’ is a big plus with us, and something a lot of brands seem to be picking up on. We’d much rather stock up on products with longevity or that just slot in the home, and this ticks both these boxes.

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